what do you call a joke without a punchline
listen the secret to pulling anything off—be it red lipstick or shaving half your head or wearing something ridiculous—is to literally just fucking do the thing and immediately adopt an attitude of giving no fucks, even if you have to fake it
i don’t want to be someone’s princess make me your fucking queen
i’m going to cry
the 1975 twenty one pilots show is completely sold out like i can’t find tickets anywhere
i would literally give a kidney to go to this concert you don’t understand everything is awful and i want to jump off a bridge
the longer my hair gets the more powerful i become
I REALLY LIKE THIS URBAN LEGEND BEHIND THE WORD, "FUCK"
THAT SAID THAT IN THE MIDDLE AGES, DURING THE BLACK DEATH, RESOURCES WERE SCARCE SO COUPLES HAD TO OBTAIN ROYAL PERMISSION TO HAVE CHILDREN
SO THEY HAD TO PUT UP A SIGN ON THEIR HOUSE (VISIBLE ON THE ROAD) THAT SAID,
“FORNICATION UNDER CONSENT of KING”
AND THEIR ENTIRE STREET WOULD KNOW THEY’RE FUCKING
This is one of the few things of note my father taught me.
- They’re either good with their hands, throats, tongues, or lips (sometimes all of the above)
- They’re musicians???